Emotional Anxiety and Time on The Floor

I find myself always sinking to the floor in times of emotional anxiety. You know the times. When tears just won’t stop. When the thoughts that could help you pull yourself together scatter into the neural cloud like a flock of crows flapping to the tune of a barking dog. That barking dog is me crying, by the way. Or, at least, the dog is the emotional monster that drove me to the floor in the first place. But the messy metaphors lose us now. Emotions will do that too–pull me into the massive abyss of analyzation that goes nowhere but in circles. One thing is for certain, though. The lower I go, the more I am comforted.

It’s strange. You would think that being on the floor would be a sign of self-deprecation and defeat. But for me it’s a sign of stabilization and surrender–something my emotional anxiety needs to lose its power over me.

The Stories of Uneasy Lowering

Thinking about the times I spend on the floor, reminds me of those Bible stories I grew up with where people “were let down” or “bowed low” or “fell prostrate”. These instances of lowering oneself to the bidding of whatever power ruled over the tale were always accompanied shortly after by a miracle or a blessing.

Rahab lowered the spies by the scarlet cord. As a result her whole family survived the battle when Israel overtook the city of Jericho. The guards lowered Daniel into the den of lions. The next day his survival changed the heart of a pagan king. The friends of a lame man lowered him in his bed by ropes through the roof of a house. Jesus healed his sickness of body and heart.

Lowering to My Emotional Anxiety

Whether you believe in a higher power or not, lowering yourself signifies deference. In regards to my tendency to lower my own body to the floor when my emotional anxiety runs high and my thoughts tangle together in a mass of overwhelm, this is a sign of me giving my emotions their place. Not so much a giving in to depression and anxiety as a ruler over me, but more of a polite nod to their power and significance in my life.

For they are powerful are they not? But power does not have to mean rulership. And who rules my emotions but me? Even when sadness floods my heart or anger rears its ugly head, I rule myself. It’s when I don’t rule myself that uneasy things happen. And so, when I am ready to deal with my raw emotions and anxious thoughts, I sit on the floor.